Can we shift gears today?

Stick it in neutral and discuss some really basically unimportant topic?

It’s something I’m pretty certain I’ve never before addressed in a real life conversation, let alone a blog post.

The topic is just this ….

mascara.

Right.  Yes.  Mascara.

You see, I do not qualify as a girly-girl.

My mom never really wore make up.

I never really wore make up.

When I was about sixteen I experimented with this trendy new clear eye lash lengthening product that looked like clear nail gloss for your lashes.

One morning in high school I slathered the gooey stuff across my lashes.

By afternoon I was wiping crusty flakes of lash dandruff from my cheeks.

It was as gross as it sounds.

Since then about once or twice every year I start thinking I should try out mascara.

I know better than to attempt any other make up style face product.  I’m not in for foundation – it makes me feel weird and I don’t care for the extra layer on my skin.  Eye shadow feels too dramatic for my real life and I don’t care for lipstick stains on anything so I’m a chap stick only girl.  (When I feel wild, I pick a tinted chap stick.)

But mascara.

Well, that seems a little fun sometimes.

Which leads me to my question.

Is there truly a variety of mascara that is actually waterproof or cry proof?  (You know, since I embraced my crying side, you just never know what a day will hold.)

Here’s my trivial dilemma.

Obviously my research has been sporadic, but with every mascara I have tried, black smudges appear under my eyes at some point through the day.  Is that normal? I don’t want to look like a football player by lunchtime.  I look around at the mascara-clad eyelashes of other females.  I don’t see weird black smudges under their eyes.  Even when I patiently remove the mascara in the evening, I can discover those unattractive smudges the next day – sometimes even two days later.   That’s weird.  Is that just me?

So.  Seriously friends.

If you have some mascara words of wisdom that you’re holding out on – can you let me in on the secret?